Why Julianne Moore cheating on her wife in The Kids Are All Right is actually a positive step towards gay acceptance

If you’ve seen the trailer for The Kids Are All Right, you know that Julianne Moore’s character is unfaithful to her wife, which is why I felt comfortable incorporating that bit into my post title.  If you haven’t seen the film yet, however, you may want to wait to read the remainder of my post until you have done so.

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There has been some uproar amongst lesbian women over how we were portrayed in this summer’s Focus Features film, The Kids Are All Right.  You see, after eighteen years of marriage, Jules, played by Julianne Moore, cheats on her wife.  And not with another woman, but with a man. 

You can see why, when homosexuals are judged on the limited experiences most people use to shape their opinions on gay rights, this would have some lesbo’s throwing their arms up in frustration.

Oh that’s great… we finally make our way into a prominant Hollywood film and the chic representing us feels the immediate need to blow off her family and run off to dick.

But having people sit down to watch this movie and them seeing how Jules succumbs to her marriage strains and sleeps with her male sperm donor is actually a good thing for gay acceptance and here’s why…

About 10 minutes into the movie, we completely forget that we’re watching a lesbian couple.   Instead, we’re absolutely thrown into the drama of a real marriage. 

Jules and Nic, played by Annette Benning, have moved well beyond the thrills of a new relationship.  While there’s no doubt that they love each other, they have lost their spark a bit.  As a result, Jules is absolutely starving to feel loved… dying for someone to make her feel like she’s special again.  Which is why, when she and Mark Ruffalo have an overly energetic fuck, though we’re disappointed… we get it.

Julianne Moore doesn’t keep going back to Mark Ruffalo (who looks amazing, by the way) because he’s a man, but because he makes her feel alive and sexy, something that probably 99.9% of people who have been married for a period of time have found themselves hungry for.

So yes, cheating on your spouse is absolutely wrong.  But if you watch that movie and don’t at least sympathize with Julianne Moore’s character a little bit, then you probably have an unrealistic idea of what making a long term commitment to somebody really entails.

And it’s making those who watch the film empathize with Jules’ character that makes this movie so important.

So lesbians, the movie is a good thing for us.  We don’t want to be portrayed in a fantasy way, like Snow White being awoken by a loving kiss from Princess Cinderella, but as real human beings who experience the same things that straight couples do.  The ups, the downs, the thrills, and the insecurities. 

The movie keeps it real, discussing both the beautiful and difficult elements of being married.  And it’s able to do so with two women.

On a side note, the acting performances in this film are absolutely incredible.  This may be my favorite movie of the year so far.  See the trailer below: